What Exactly Are Young Women Being Told to Wait For?
Maybe this will offend some people.
That’s okay.
Everywhere I turn, I hear the same advice.
“Don’t get married in your early twenties.”
“Go and discover yourself first.”
“Wait until you’re 28 or 30.”
And every time I hear it, one question comes to my mind…
What exactly are we asking young women to discover?
I’m genuinely asking.
Because the way people talk, you’d think getting married at 22 automatically means your life is over.
Who said so?
If a woman meets a responsible, intentional man at 22…
A man who believes in her dreams…
A man willing to support her education…
A man who wants to build with her instead of controlling her…
Why should she reject him simply because society says she’s “too young”?
Who made 28 the magic number?
Another thing I find interesting is this…
People keep saying,
“Go and enjoy your life first.”
But what exactly does “enjoy your life” mean?
Travel?
Build a career?
Start a business?
Those things are beautiful.
But who says they cannot happen within a healthy marriage?
Who convinced us that marriage automatically ends ambition?
I’ve seen women graduate after getting married.
I’ve seen women start businesses after getting married.
I’ve seen women become doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs and leaders while married.
So maybe marriage wasn’t the problem.
Maybe the wrong partner was.
And here’s another question nobody seems to ask…
If you’re telling a 22-year-old woman to wait until she’s 28…
Can you guarantee that the right man will still come at 28?
Can you guarantee she’ll even want the same things at 28?
Can you guarantee life will go exactly as planned?
None of us can.
Life doesn’t give guarantees.
It only gives opportunities.
Sometimes the opportunity comes early.
Sometimes it comes late.
The real question isn’t,
“How old are you?”
The real question is,
“Who is standing in front of you?”
Is he responsible?
Does he respect you?
Does he support your purpose?
Can both of you grow together?
Those questions matter far more than the number on your birthday cake.
I’m not saying every woman should marry young.
Far from it.
Some people genuinely need more time to mature.
Some relationships shouldn’t end in marriage at all.
What I’m questioning is this idea that age alone determines whether a marriage will succeed.
It doesn’t.
Character does.
Wisdom does.
Choosing the right person does.
Maybe we’ve spent so much time teaching women when to marry…
That we’ve forgotten to teach both men and women how to choose wisely.
Or maybe I’m looking at it the wrong way.
If a 22-year-old woman meets an intentional man who genuinely supports her dreams, should she walk away simply because society says she’s too young?
Eclypse Onyx
What Exactly Are Young Women Being Told to Wait For?Maybe this will offend some people.That’s okay.Everywhere I turn, I hear the same advice.“Don’t get married in your early twenties.”“Go and discover yourself first.”“Wait until you’re 28 or 30.”And every time I hear it, one question comes to my mind…What exactly are we asking young women to discover?I’m genuinely asking.Because the way people talk, you’d think getting married at 22 automatically means your life is over.Who said so?If a woman meets a responsible, intentional man at 22…A man who believes in her dreams…A man willing to support her education…A man who wants to build with her instead of controlling her…Why should she reject him simply because society says she’s “too young”?Who made 28 the magic number?Another thing I find interesting is this…People keep saying,“Go and enjoy your life first.”But what exactly does “enjoy your life” mean?Travel?Build a career?Start a business?Those things are beautiful.But who says they cannot happen within a healthy marriage?Who convinced us that marriage automatically ends ambition?I’ve seen women graduate after getting married.I’ve seen women start businesses after getting married.I’ve seen women become doctors, lawyers, entrepreneurs and leaders while married.So maybe marriage wasn’t the problem.Maybe the wrong partner was.And here’s another question nobody seems to ask…If you’re telling a 22-year-old woman to wait until she’s 28…Can you guarantee that the right man will still come at 28?Can you guarantee she’ll even want the same things at 28?Can you guarantee life will go exactly as planned?None of us can.Life doesn’t give guarantees.It only gives opportunities.Sometimes the opportunity comes early.Sometimes it comes late.The real question isn’t,“How old are you?”The real question is,“Who is standing in front of you?”Is he responsible?Does he respect you?Does he support your purpose?Can both of you grow together?Those questions matter far more than the number on your birthday cake.I’m not saying every woman should marry young.Far from it.Some people genuinely need more time to mature.Some relationships shouldn’t end in marriage at all.What I’m questioning is this idea that age alone determines whether a marriage will succeed.It doesn’t.Character does.Wisdom does.Choosing the right person does.Maybe we’ve spent so much time teaching women when to marry…That we’ve forgotten to teach both men and women how to choose wisely.Or maybe I’m looking at it the wrong way.If a 22-year-old woman meets an intentional man who genuinely supports her dreams, should she walk away simply because society says she’s too young?Eclypse Onyx